A writer by the name of Jim Hogue penned an article for the website TheRichest a little while back entitled “15 Thoughts Every Guy Has When Dating a Bigger Woman.” While you can’t find the original article on the website anymore (likely due to pissed off readers), you can still find countless angry women posting about it all over the web. The ignorant, fat-shaming listicle has gems about a plus-sized woman’s supposed superior ability to cook and her overwhelming desire to please. If there is one thing that can help quell your anger while reading this, it’s that he was most likely fired immediately after receiving immense public backlash, seeing as how the article does not show up on TheRichest anymore and his most recent article for the site was published right before the “15 Thoughts” run date. Plus-sized women, what do you think it’s really like to date a plus-sized girl? Give us your enlightened thoughts in the comments!
She knows how to cook for you. You can find the content of the original article summed up on several websites all over the internet. SheKnows.com lists each of Hogue’s 15 bullet points, one of them being that a plus-sized woman will know how to cook for you. Just because one woman is bigger than another, doesn’t mean she’s a better cook. Ever hear of takeout? That sh*t is bangin’.
At least other men won’t get jealous. Another benefit to dating a plus-sized woman is that other dudes won’t be sniffing around your goods. You won’t have to worry about getting jealous or having to defend your title as “boyfriend” because no one will go out of their way to take her from you. Uh, Drake said he likes his girls BBW. Therefore, you are wrong, sir.
She can handle herself. Don’t worry. You won’t ever have to jump in and defend your lady if she’s plus-sized because she’s had to do it her whole life on her own – she’s got this. You’ll only ever have to defend a skinny chick. Yeah, it doesn’t matter what size we are. Women can handle themselves, jerk. And if they do need you to step in, it’s not going to be because of their weight.
They’re easy. According to Hogue, thicker women are “easier” because they have fewer options. They are more likely to accept your offer to date because they just don’t get many offers and will jump at whatever they can get. Dafuq did you just say? We’re pretty sure this cat is smarter than you.
You don’t have to worry about how you look next to her. Since she’s plus-sized, you’ll never have to worry about looking bad when you’re standing next to her. You’ll always look good by comparison. OK, if your self-esteem is really THAT low that you have to have someone stand next to you to make you look better, you don’t need a girlfriend, you need counseling.
If you do want to work out, you’ll always know you have a work out buddy. In case you do want to take it upon yourself to look better (even though you don’t have to because you’re a man and no one cares what you look like), you’ll always have a work out buddy in a plus-sized girl! This isn’t because she likes to work out, though, but because she needs to. Yeah, no.
They’ll up a man’s confidence until he can go for the skinny girl. According to the genius of Hogue, plus-sized girls are confidence boosters. You don’t really want to date her, you just want to date someone to get your self-esteem up. When you do, you’ll feel confident enough to go after the attractive, thin girls you’ve always wanted. Newsflash, women aren’t cars. You’re not just working your way up to a better model.
They’re best for cuddling. The more plump they are, the better they are for cuddles! We’re not exactly sure how to take this. At first it does seem like a compliment, but on the other hand, he’s still evaluating a woman’s usefulness as a dating option based on her body type. We don’t need to be reviewed, thank you.
Finding somewhere to eat is simple because they aren’t picky. Skinny girls are always picky. They’ll drive you crazy looking for just the right salad spot or health-nut joint. Plus-sized girls will eat anything and everything, so it really doesn’t matter where you take them! Hey Hogue, just because a woman is on the larger side, doesn’t mean she lacks food preferences.
They’re easier to talk to. A plus-sized woman is apparently just so thankful to be in the company of a man who wants her that she’ll willingly listen to anything he has to say. Not like skinny girls! Skinny girls know they’re attractive so they can get away with ignoring you. Seriously, what era do you live in and who have you been hanging out with?
They won’t be counting calories. Not only will she not be counting her own calories, but she won’t be counting yours either. That means, she’ll never bother you about having too many slices of pizza or eating a burrito for every meal for a week straight. She clearly doesn’t care about health so she won’t nag you about yours. Well, since she’s not counting calories, she won’t have to waste time figuring out how many are in the pie she’s about to throw in your face.
They are eager to please you. A plus-sized woman will do whatever it takes to hang on to the man she so miraculously procured. That means whatever you want is what she’ll do. Nothing is off limits, bro! Hey bro, want to do us a favor and stick your penis in this garbage disposal for a second?
They’re funnier because they’re not as good-looking. This is one we’ve all heard before, not just from Hogue. It’s even appeared in pop-culture over and over again. Fat girls are supposed to be funnier and have better personalities because they’re not as attractive. They have to compensate for their lack of outer beauty. What if we told you that fat girls and skinny girls could be mean, just as fat girls and skinny girls could be nice? Would that blow your f*****g mind?
She’ll do whatever you want. Your relationship will be entirely on your terms. Like in the bedroom, she’ll be willing to do whatever it is you want to do on a daily basis just to please you and hang on to you. She doesn’t know when she’ll get an opportunity like this again! For her sake, we hope never.
Inexplicably, some people just like “fatties” better. Hogue concedes that some men are truly attracted to larger women, but the reason why apparently baffles him to no end. Hmm, let’s see if we can think of a few. How about, everyone has their own taste? Attraction varies from person to person? A woman’s character matters more than the number on the scale?